Eighteen Candles...... / Karen Gosselin
At this writing, if I'd count the amount of tears I've shed since we've lost Jake, I could probably fill my backyard pond.
A 16 yr old taken from us in the prime of his childhood years. An active, healthy, handsome son who died innocently at the hands of others.
As we come upon Jake's 18th birthday, I find myself coming to an abrupt halt, wondering how I'll make it thru the day. As I light 18 candles today throughout our home, I light these candles for my child that will never grow old.
Today should be a time when Jake was crossing over the border of childhood to manhood and all the wonders that transition would encompass. Instead, he crossed over on a journey he took alone, and we were left behind, broken hearted and aching for him.
What can I say of that incredible day that brought such terrible tragic news to our doorstep? What can I say to the endless pain of his passing in the violent way he left us? What can I say to the weight of a grief that begins weeks before any birthday, anniversary or holiday?
What can I say about the man that failed to yield, how could he possibly not see them?
What can I say about my son dying in an uninsured vehicle that had only one working brake, which no one takes responsibility for, and still to this day claims there was nothing wrong with the car? What can I say to all those that fully knew that car had only one brake?
I crawl out of bed with heavy emotional weight, dragging my feet, tugging at my heart. Any parent who has lost a child truly feels our pain. No one else can understand the magnitude, both the physical and emotional grief that drains so completely from the inside out.
In the death of our son, we have discovered with certainty that we lack the means to control the most cherished elements of our lives. But we also know that within each of us is the potential to rise above the debilitating anguish we all experience. Each day I remind myself, love is immotal. May the immortality of love grow secure and healthy again within each of us.
Safely Home / K. In Loving Memory Of Jake's Grandpa Read >>
Safely Home / K. In Loving Memory Of Jake's Grandpa
I am home in heaven, dear ones; All's so happy, all so bright! There is perfect joy and beauty In this everlasting light.
All the pain and grief are over, Every restless tossing passed; I am now at peace forever, Safely home in heaven at last.
Did you wonder I so calmly Trod the Valley of the Shade? Oh! but Jesus love illumined Every dark and fearful glade.
And he came Himself to meet me In that way so hard to tread; And with Jesus' arm to learn on, Could I have one doubt or dread? Then you must not grieve so sorely, For I love you dearly still: Try to look beyond earth's shadows, Pray to trust our Father's will.
There is work still waiting for you, So you must not idly stand; Do your work while life remaineth- You shall rest in Jesus' land.
When that work is all completed, He will gently call you home; Oh, the rapture of that meeting! Oh, the joy to see you come! Close
For Jake / Me
My life is brilliant. My love is pure. I saw an angel. Of that I'm sure. She smiled at me on the subway. She was with another man. But I won't lose no sleep on that, 'Cause I've got a plan. You're beautiful. You're beautiful. You're beautiful, it's true. I saw you face in a crowded place, And I don't know what to do, 'Cause I'll never be with you. Yeah, she caught my eye, As we walked on by. She could see from my face that I was, Fucking high, And I don't think that I'll see her again, But we shared a moment that will last till the end. You're beautiful. You're beautiful. You're beautiful, it's true. I saw you face in a crowded place, And I don't know what to do, 'Cause I'll never be with you. You're beautiful. You're beautiful. You're beautiful, it's true. There must be an angel with a smile on her face, When she thought up that I should be with you. But it's time to face the truth, I will never be with you.
WHAT HURTS THE MOST / Jessica S. I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house, that don't bother me I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out I'm not afraid to cry Every once in a while even though goin on with you gone still upsets me There are days Every now and again i pretend i'm okay but that's not what gets me
What hurts the most, was being so close And having so much to say And watchin you walk away Never knowing, what could have been And not seein that lovin you Is what i was tryin to do
It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere i go But i'm doin it It's hard to force that smile when i see our old friends and i'm alone Still harder gettin up, gettin dressed, livin with this regret
But i know if i could do it over I would trade, give away all the words that i saved in my heart that i left unspoken
What hurts the most, is being so close And having so much to say And watchin you walk away Never knowing, what could have been And not seein that lovin you Is what i was tryin to do
What hurts the most, was being so close And having so much to say And watchin you walk away And never knowing, what could have been And not seein that lovin you Is what i was tryin to do
not seein that lovin you that’s what I was tryin to do…
this is a song by Rascal Flatts Its Called What Hurts The Most.. it reminds me of Jake and how much he really means to me.. I loved him so much.. he was always givin me advice and helping me when I needed him. I LOVE YOU JACOB PERRY GOSSELINClose
I believe God's promises are true. I believe Heaven is real.
I believe God will see US through. I believe nothing can separate
Us from God's love. I believe God has work for me to do.
"Believing against the grain" means having a survivalist attitude. Not only can WE survive, but out of it we can create something good. We need to cry out to each other for help and cry out, "God help US believe!"
Thinking of you and thanking you for your thoughts and prayers while my hands are recovering. Melissa
Thursday March 23rd, 2006 / Karen Gosselin Read >>
Thursday March 23rd, 2006 / Karen Gosselin
Today we mourn the loss of Jacob's grandfather. In our hearts we take comfort knowing that Jacob and his Grandfather Edward are together in heaven. We know that Jacob has welcomed Grandpa into heaven with open arms.
Rest in peace Edward......No more pain, no more suffering. Take care of each other in Heaven....
Here on earth we are put together in families. Our loved ones become inexpressibly precious to us. We live in intimate associations. One gets so close to mother and father, wife or husband, sons and daughters, that they literally become a part of one's very life. Then comes a day when a strange change comes over one that we love. He is transformed before our very eyes. The light of life goes out for him. He cannot speak to us nor we to him. He is gone and we are left stunned and heartbroken. An emptiness and loneliness comes into our hearts. We brokenheartedly say "That the one whom I loved is dead." It is such a cold, hopeless thing to realize. Then, out of the very depths of our despair, comes that marvelous declaration of our Lord: I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: and whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die. John 11: 25,26
Then we know! We know we have not lost our loved ones who have died. We have just been separated, and as long as we live there will be an empty place left in our hearts. To some extent, the loneliness will always be there. But when we really know that one is not forever lost, it does seem to take away, a little bit, of the sorrow. There is a vast difference between precious memories, loneliness, the pain of separation, on the one hand, and a sorrow that ruins and blights our lives, on the other hand.
Hope these words are of comfort to you my friends. Please, please know that you are always on my mind and in my heart and prayers. My hands are not better yet, in fact the left one is very numb right now, so it is hard to type. But even though I can't write every day as I did before, I think of you every day. In Christian Love, Melissa
Not now, but in the coming years, it may be in the better land: we'll read the meaning of our tears, and there, some time, we'll understand.
~.~/ Forever BrokenHearted I light a candle every day, Hoping the pain will fade away, But with the light of each new dawn, Another day and your still gone.Close
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